Letting go of the guilt when you can’t deliver at 100% all the time
I used to think being productive meant I was doing okay. Like if I kept my days full and my to-do list checked, it meant I was strong, focused, managing it all. But there were times I was crumbling inside, and still pushing through tasks like a robot. And the truth is, a lot of that was fear, fear of being seen as lazy, or weak, or falling behind.
Somewhere along the way, we picked up this idea that being useful equals being worthy. That if you’re not producing something, content, results, clean dishes, success, then you’re wasting time. That you’re wasting your life. It’s a ridiculous expectation when you say it out loud, but most of us carry it quietly every day.
The guilt of doing nothing
There were moments where I was just tired, emotionally and mentally, and all I needed was rest. But I’d sit on the couch and feel this buzzing guilt in my chest, like I should be up cleaning something, responding to someone, working on a project. Like pausing meant I was falling behind in a race I didn’t even sign up for.
I think that guilt comes from a world that glorifies busyness. You see people posting 5am routines, side hustles, perfectly colour coded planners, and suddenly you’re questioning your own pace. But what we don’t see in those snapshots is the burnout, the anxiety, the stuff that’s breaking behind the scenes.
Survival mode is not a productivity challenge
When you’re struggling, really struggling, your mind and body shift into survival mode. And survival mode is not built for creation, innovation, or peak output. It’s built for getting through. And getting through is already enough.
So no, you’re not lazy because you couldn’t finish that task. You’re not failing because you took a nap instead of cleaning the kitchen. You’re doing what you need to stay afloat. And that’s valuable. That’s what matters.
There’s something quietly revolutionary about giving yourself permission to rest when everything in you is screaming to push. Because in that pause, you’re choosing self-respect over performance. You’re saying: I matter even when I’m not producing.
Productivity doesn’t define healing
Some days healing looks like therapy and journaling and breakthroughs. But other days it’s binge watching something light and eating toast for dinner. And that doesn’t mean you’re not healing. It just means healing doesn’t look the same every day.
We need to stop expecting ourselves to bounce back immediately, to “use” pain as fuel, to turn every hard moment into a growth opportunity on a schedule. Sometimes, it’s just hard. And that’s all.
When we start allowing ourselves to not be useful for a bit, something surprising happens: we start to feel again. We stop numbing through work. We come back to ourselves.
Being is enough
Maybe we need to remember that our worth isn’t something we earn through output. That just being here, even messy and quiet and tired, is enough. Maybe the most radical thing we can do when we’re struggling is to let ourselves simply exist.
So if today you’re not productive, if all you did was wake up and try again, that counts. It all counts. And you’re not behind. You’re not failing. You’re just human. And that’s more than enough.